Dear friends,
I get excited when I receive personal snail mail and the greeting card I received recently from my sister, Darlene, was no exception. Featuring two Victorian-era women sitting with their arms around one another lovingly gazing into one another’s eyes, the captions read, “You’re intelligent, talented…and a fabulous shopper. Okay, your turn. You have a beautiful body, a positive attitude and a great personality. Okay, your turn.” The words inside the card summed it all up: “We turn to each other for a lift, a laugh and to remind us how really great we are!”
I love this card! The only thing missing was a photo of a third sister, our sister Jeanne. Throughout our more than fifty years together, we three sisters have been there for one another through broken hearts, fashion fauxs, graduations, weddings, births, hospitalizations, yoga classes, craft sessions, bad hair cuts, not to mention bad hair colors, entrepreneurial dreams and more. Together, we’ve laughed uncontrollably, cried uncontrollably and ate uncontrollably (Guess what we do best?). Anchored by the love and wisdom of a vivacious 87 year old mother, we know we are truly blessed.
Last fall, while formulating the idea for the twenty-first book in the Eat Your Peas Collection, Eat Your Peas for the Cure, my sister Darlene was the perfect person to invite to be my co-author. Darlene is my hero and she’s my sister Jeanne’s hero too. Darlene is a three-time cancer survivor. And what an inspiration she is! Her tenderness, wit and understanding are on every page of our latest pea in the pod, Eat Your Peas for a Cure. Inside the gift book you’ll find little endearments like:
- You are stronger, tougher and smarter than this disease. Remind yourself often.
- As you travel down the treatment trail, I’ll be cheering you on all the way.
- It’s okay to play the cancer card. You’re entitled. (Be sure to use it when you get caught doing something you’re not supposed to be doing!)
- Every time you pick up this book, consider yourself hugged. And cherished too.
- Where there is humor, there is hope.
Eat Your Peas for the Cure is a loving way to reach out to anyone who has any form of cancer. And it’s perfect for both men and women, alike.
Sometimes, and often too often, our journey on this earth reminds us how much we need one another to lean on and to learn from. Every day, my sister Darlene teaches Jeanne and me--and others who are touched by Dar’s grace and humor--to be more present, more grateful, more loving and to say what really matters.
So why not call, write or email a sister, a friend, a mother or someone else who is near and dear to your heart and tell them how intelligent they are, how beautiful their body is and what a great personality they have--and everything else that you’ve been meaning to say to your loved ones lately. Words really do matter. Why not begin sharing them more generously today?
Wishing you peas and plenty of joy,
Cheryl
PS. If there is someone you know who has been recently diagnosed with the cancer, Darlene has created a list of things you can do to help them on their journey. Read below:
What To Do List (when a loved one tells you they have cancer.)
Copyright Darlene Hauff March 2008
info@gentlyspoken.com
Bring Food!
Healthy juices (V-fusion) or fruit smoothies
Boost (calorie and nutrient drink)
Specialty ice cream - sherberts
"Fresh, cut up fruit"
Soups or hotdishes in small containers to freeze
Frozen fruit bars
Make favorite dessert
Healthy snacks such as almonds
Treats for caregivers
Services
" No one likes to ask for help, so it is hard when someone calls and asks what they can do. Just do it."
See dishes in the sink..wash them.
Offer to water plants or garden. Weed.
Offer to bring lunch or dinner and eat together.
Short visits.
Rub hands or feet. Especially if neuropathy is setting in.
Be a chemo or radiation buddy. I asked people to sit with me during chemo who I knew would boost me up.
Read or research side effects of treatments and suggested solutions.
Help patient devise a daily self care list to remind them of all the items they need to do each day.
"Check out hospital Cancer Resource Centers and help set up appointments for massages, healing touch sessions."
"If losing hair, pick up head scarfs from Cancer Resource Centers usually at no charge."
Drive to doctor appointments or treatments.
Bring movies and watch together.
Offer to go wig shopping and make it a fun event.
Add name to prayer list at your church.
"What special service can you offer? Evening boat rides, a pedicure, a convertible ride?"
Borrow your favorite books or movies.
Send cards (I had one friend that sent me a card every week for four months.)
"If a co-worker, offer to get coffee or lunch. Energy has to be conserved."
Call when going to the grocery or drug store. Need anything?
Encourage short walks or Yoga stretches to keep muscles in shape.
Remind patient to accept all help offered. Loved ones feel better if they can do something to help.
Appreciated gifts
Cozy warm blanket or throw
New robe
Comfy pajamas
Soft socks or slippers
Lavender scented microwaveable hot pack
Fresh flowers or plant (Idea: Send to 1st chemo treatment.)
Photo box for cards
Relaxation or guided imagery CD
Lotions (Palmers cocoa butter is a good massage one.)
Burts Bees chapstick
Supplies for a facial or relaxing bath
Gift certificate to book store
Extra soft childs toothbrush for irritated gums
Unique thank you notes and stamps
Prayer shawl from your church
File box to put all cancer info into
Magazines
Soft sheets
